Aunt Lois Wants a Dance Fight

So tonight, when I got bored watching the news and waiting for the government to shut down, I switched over to Dancing With the Stars. But after five minutes of watching their quickstep-soft shoe-hand jive thing, I suddenly realized—IT’S THE SAME DAMN SHOW. That’s right, no difference. Semi-famous people dancing around with jazz hands hoping that someone will actually pay attention and later vote for them. Sure, Dancing With the Stars has snazzier clothes. God knows no one wants to see those creepy, hairsprayed politicos in sequins with their shirts unbuttoned to their waists. But other than that, there’s no difference. The dancers try to move more smoothly and look better than the other competitors and hope their fan base will like them enough to vote them through. The politicos try to yell louder and score more face time than everyone else, while hoping their tap dancing will get people to vote for them in the end.  Honestly, I’d rather see the politicos literally dance it out and stop yapping at each other.  Make them pair up with someone from the other party. Have them learn the  fox trot, perform on national TV, and whichever pair wins gets to decide what the hell happens […]