Aunt Lois’ Guide to Life, Volume 1
Anyone who knows Philly knows families live near each other, bunched together like little ant farms. My Aunt Lois, in fact, lives the next block over, and I can usually find her on the stoop in her...
View ArticleAunt Lois’ Guide to Life, Vol. 2 (How’s this for “Real”?)
What’s with these so-called “real” housewives plastered all over my TV? They are not “real,” and they’re definitely not “housewives.” They don’t know a turkey baster from a toilet brush. Besides, who...
View ArticleAunt Lois Says: The Thigh’s the Limit
So my daughter Julia is obsessed with thighs. Not as in “chicken thighs are on sale at the SuperMart so I filled my basement with them” obsessed, mind you. No, she’s obsessed with women’s thighs,...
View ArticleAunt Lois Curls Her Lip
DO NOT — USE WHILE SLEEPING. This is the warning I found on the new curling iron my daughter bought last week. Now when I saw that, I have to admit I felt a little sick. I mean, if I counted all...
View ArticleAunt Lois Wants a Dance Fight
So tonight, when I got bored watching the news and waiting for the government to shut down, I switched over to Dancing With the Stars. But after five minutes of watching their quickstep-soft shoe-hand...
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